God speaks in the night's stillness and the dawn's breaking. When Rev. Dr. Bonnie Bates was with us in September, she reminded us of the United Church of Christ's tagline: "God is still SPEAKING," I ask: Are we listening?
I had a conversation with one of my clergy colleagues this week. We were speaking about all the changes I have been experiencing since my strokes and the accident. She said, "I don't doubt that you love Jesus. However, I don't think you have ever let Jesus love you." There was an awkward silence. I didn't know what to say, but I knew what she said was the truth. My ministry career has been focused on saving the church and the world. Perhaps I was the one who needed to be saved.
John Wesley wrote in his journal about his first trip to the Americas: "I came to convert the savages, but oh, who would convert me?"
Funerals are never easy. Family and friends come from around the country to pay their respects and connect. There is a brief sense of intimacy, but it quickly departs once everyone has returned home. The next time they see each other, they will be at another funeral or wedding.
True intimacy with another person means being present with family and friends daily. The people you connect with on Facebook friends are rarely your friends. They are classmates from the past or business associates that you connect with. I have over 400 Facebook friends but never talk to most of them. Facebook is false intimacy.
In Genesis 25, we see Issac and Ishmael coming together to bury their father. Remember, God had promised Abraham's descendants to be more numerous than the stars. The blessing was only intended to go through Issac.
However, due to Abraham and Sarah's sins, the blessing was also given to Hagar's son Ishmael. Twice in the wilderness, God confirmed the blessing to Hagar and Ishmael.
All their lives, there was a warring relationship between Issac and Ishmael. Yet, they found it with themselves to come together and bury their father. Sometimes, the hardest thing to do is to lay down our weapons and do what is right.
Funerals are not for the dead but for the living. Someone asked me how Mary and I were doing with the death of Mary's brother Duane. I replied, "We are angry and filled with rage, yet we know that God has not left us in death." With every moment we experience death, there is new life. Life everlasting that cannot be taken away.
On World Communion Sunday, Rev. Todd Goddard reminded us, "when we are baptized, we are sealed with the Holy Spirit. There is nothing we can do to escape God's grace."
Issac and Ishmael were sealed with God's grace. Two nations were born through Abraham, and blessings were given even for Abraham and Sarah's sins.
I will close with this quote by Miguel de Cervantes, the Spanish author behind perhaps one of the greatest works of literature ever penned.
Don Quixote,[a][b] the full title being The Ingenious Gentleman Don Quixote of La Mancha,[c] is a Spanish novel by Miguel de Cervantes. It was initially published in two parts, in 1605 and 1615. It is considered a founding work of Western literature and is often labeled the first modern novel. [2][3] Don Quixote is also one of the most translated books in the world[4] and one of the best-selling novels of all time.
This quote almost seems as if the gospels inspired it.
"I honor those who speak to the wind, the mad lovers, the visionaries, the dreamers, the ones who would bring life to a dream. To the rejected, to the excluded. To the men of the heart, those who still believe in pure feelings. To those who are mocked and judged. To those who aren't afraid to speak their mind and never give up."
This week, I shared with my daughter, Kiah, that during a time of loss or when a person is in recovery, this is not the time to walk away from them. It is an opportunity to walk with them and hold their hands on their journeys.
When you go to a funeral, please don't say, "Oh, they're in a better place," or "God needed another angel." Tell the family who's grieving how upset you are over their loved one's death, and remind them that the God who raised Jesus from the dead will raise your loved one.
Take the place of humility and leave the platitudes at the door—they mean nothing except to self-soothe you and your conscience. This day is not about you. It is about God and what God does in God's time.
Early in ER, the critically acclaimed television show Dr. John Carter tries to convince Mr. Reubeadux not to let his wife Ruby not have surgery. Because of the surgery, Ruby dies. Dr. Carter goes to the funeral in the graveyard and says to Mr. Rebeaudux, "I'm sorry…" he is interrupted by Mr. Rebeaudux, who says, "This day is not about you, Mr. Carter." He walks away with Dr. Carter, looking at the casket.
Sometimes, we must sit with our grief and not say anything. "God is still SPEAKING,"
Will we
ever listen in the moments that cause us to doubt our faith?
Issac and Ishmael came together in grief and loss and set aside their anger and the desire to harm one another. They buried their father and went their separate ways. Sometimes, some wounds won't be on this side of heaven but never doubt that God's grace brings comfort and healing in this space and time.
Amen
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